The iconic bad boy’s appeal has been on the decline. The manly man, the broad-shouldered, chiseled macho with the prominent jaw bone might be a thing of the past. His contender, the timid, quiet nerd, the beta male has been moving on his territory and gaining recognition and admirers along the way.

Why just turn on the TV. Shows like the Big Bang Theory are the school example of the quest of betas to rise to the top. Betas receive much more attention on these show and more often than not, they portray the protagonist, while the classic alpha gets the role of the “villain” or bully in these shows.

Chances are, you’ve witnessed this societal shift yourself and you’re looking the bag yourself a thoughtful, driven, friendly, and intelligent beta male. If that’s your plan, just keep on reading since we’re going to go over the essentials of attracting one and the benefits of dating a beta male.


First thing’s first: who exactly are alphas and betas? The alpha is most commonly described as the powerful, aggressive, and dominant man who exudes confidence and who is in great shape. An alpha displays masculine qualities, has a deep voice, muscular with a defined bone structure.

Betas, on the other hand, are mostly introverted, extremely intelligent, capable, thoughtful, and driven. They are – in most cases – smaller in stature and less muscular than alphas.

Basically, they are direct opposites and nowadays, it seems that betas are gaining the upper hand in the “battle” for dominance and popularity.


What’s exactly behind this change? What’s causing the fall of the muscle-bound, infamous alpha and allowing the scrawny beta to take their place? From a social-scientific standpoint, the shift in the male hierarchy can be attributed to societal changes such as the furthering equality of females, further acceptance of homosexuals, and the major movement to prevent bullying.


On another scientific note, from an evolutionary standpoint, betas have become much more desirable since the primary role of an alpha (attaining basic and necessary resources – hunting and gathering) has lost its importance in today’s world were brains and financial wealth is what is needed to provide, and not sheer strength brute force. This is exactly where the ever so intelligent beta shines.BRAIN OVER BRAWN


Studies have shown that the alpha male behavior is on the decline in the business world too since evidence has pointed out that it’s counter-productive in a workplace environment. “Testosterone-chocked males” in real life struggle to cooperate successfully and can hinder work progress and intimidate fellow employees with their egocentric behavior.


Even from these few study results, it’s clear that from an evolutionary standpoint, the beta was always destined to be at the top because of his abilities to provide the resources and invest faithfully in his males but the social context “wasn’t ready”. In today’s society, women are no longer obligated to tolerate the alpha’s oppressive behavior and it’s the beta’s time to shine. With the growing acceptance of homosexuality, and with the establishment of the term metrosexual, heterosexual males do not have to overcompensate to prove their sexual preferences. They can be more sensitive without being considered gay. Beta behavioral patterns are also more appropriate for children and teens to follow.

No wonder that being beta is the new alpha!


So, with all this knowledge under our belt, let’s see why is attracting a successful beta male is the best thing you can do for you.

BETAS ARE EMOTIONALLY MORE AVAILABLE – Okay, let’s set things straight. Not all alpha males are bad boys but there is a large number out there who only talk the talk and don’t walk the walk. Some of them will promise you the world but deliver nothing.

A beta male, on the other hand, will always show up and will be there for you. There might not be huge fireworks, huge dramatic breakups, and intense reunions. However, there is security and trues trust – the essential ingredients of a healthy relationship.

YOU CAN BE YOURSELF AND TRUST THEM – You can reveal your true self to them, you can be vulnerable and thus, a deeper connection can be formed which can serve as a solid basis for your healthy long-term relationship.

THEY ARE SECURE – They don’t feel the need to isolate you and you are free to spend time with your friends. They don’t want to control you and don’t suffer from constant jealousy-induced outbursts.

THE BETA’S QUIET CONFIDENCE IS SEXY – Just because they are quiet, that doesn’t automatically mean that they are boring. Yes, at first glance, the quiet and introvert beta might seem like a bore but more often than not, loud alphas try to hide their insecurities with arrogance and attention-seeking. Betas don’t need to blast out with a megaphone because they don’t need constant reassurance. They will be there to lift you up when you need them. These are much sexier traits than being loud and always suddenly leaving when things get rough.

THEY RESPECT YOU AND ARE NICE TO YOU – They treat you as worthy and won’t try to knock you down. They’ll tell you that you are beautiful and will celebrate your successes and they are proud of your achievements and will encourage you to do the things you love.

THEY DON’T NEED TO BE IN CONTROL – At times they will be strong for you at others, you can be strong for them. They don’t fear to show their weaker side. They allow you to be yourself because they love you unconditionally and they expect the same.

THE BEST DADS OUT THERE – The beta male is the best role model for a young boy – just by acting as himself. With a beta father, boys will learn that it’s okay for a man to cry. They will learn that they will need to work hard to provide for a family and to support it. Also, boys will learn that treating others as equals and being happy for their success and achievements is also important. They will learn the importance of respect and self-respect. They will become men who don’t bully others and who won’t bail out when the going gets tough.

HE COMMUNICATES – The beta male will take the time to listen to you and to help you work things out to resolve issues that may arise. He will also initiate a conversation if he feels like something needs to be talked about.

CREATIVITY – Beta men tend to have creative hobbies whether it’s cooking, music, woodworking or something else. If you are dating such a guy, you can be sure that he will encourage and will be enthusiastic about your creative pursuits. Show interest in his passion – chances are he will open up to you about it and you’ll learn a lot about his passions.

HE’S NOT AFRAID OF COMMITMENT – Alpha males will go out of their way to avoid catching feelings and prefer short-term flings. Beta males on the other hand, like the idea and the concept of committing to a person and building a trusting, deep relationship with them. They are more likely to be faithful and they like the idea of a lifelong partnership with someone who they can love, respect, encourage and help grow. In return, they’ll expect the same.


Well, after all this info, you already know that the best way to attract a successful beta is to go up to that quiet, well-dressed guy in the corner of the bar and give him your phone number, or just clearly tell him that you’re interested. There you have it.

While, this may work (let’s face it, a lot of betas are pretty quiet and sometimes even shy, so taking the first few steps can be beneficial for you), however, you’ll pretty much have to possess the goods necessary to keep him interested. By goods, we don’t necessarily mean looks and aesthetic traits. No. We mean that in order to bag yourself a successful beta, you’ll have to be a catch yourself. Charm him with your wits, creativity, intellect. Show him that you respect others and yourself. Be compassionate, be interesting and show that you are mature enough for a meaningful and deep relationship where you two can grow together both as a couple and as individuals.


All in all, attracting a beta male is not a hard thing to do as long as you have something to offer as well. Just make sure to show your best side, be enchanting, smart, charming and you’ll get yourself that caring, committed, successful, quiet, yet in-control beta male you’ve always wanted.

Don’t forget – beta is the new alpha, and just maybe there’s one waiting for you here so join today!