Dating, in general, can be a challenge for various reasons, but if you’re dating a genuinely shy girl, the frustrations can be amplified. Her social cues may confuse you and knowing if she is actually into you or not may be difficult to tell. 

However, sometimes the extra effort can make the reward that much sweeter. Dating a shy girl doesn’t have to be work because, with a little bit of knowledge and guidance, you can overcome the challenge. So, if you find yourself pursuing a shy girl, here are some tips that can help the beginning stages go a little smoother for you and ultimately lead to something good!

Every new dating endeavor brings a new set of fun and exciting challenges that hopefully keep you intrigued long enough to get to know someone. Learning how to date a shy girl has a steep learning curve and sometimes it’s well worth the extra effort.

Top 9 Tips on How to Date a Shy Girl

Tip 1: Don’t keep bringing up that she’s shy

There’s a very good chance that if she’s shy, she knows it. The worst thing that you can do is to continue bringing it up. Would you like someone to point out a flaw or less than ideal quality of yours all the time? If she tells you that she’s shy, leave it at that and start to figure out the best approach with her. It’s like the psychology theory of the white bear problem- if someone tells you to not think about the white bear, the first thought that comes to mind is a white bear. Apply this to her being shy, don’t constantly remind her of it. 

Tip 2: Make her feel comfortable

This is the key. If you ever hope that she’ll let down her guard or be less shy with you, it is key to make her feel comfortable. This may take considerably longer (sometimes not), depending on her underlying reason for her shyness. At the start of dating, building that comfort level is crucial for any relationship, but especially for someone who is shy. Stick with it, expect it to take some time and enjoy getting to know her.

Tip 3: Shy doesn’t mean insecure

It’s common to associate shy with insecure or lacking confidence. While sometimes they can go together, but it is not always the case. If you’re going to assume, assume that she is confident, and things will work out much better for you.

Tip 4: Take your time

Just like we have already mentioned, making her feel comfortable is the most important aspect of a newly found love interest. Take each step of a relationship one at a time. If you think you’re going too fast, you definitely are. She’ll let you know; you just need to be aware. 

Tip 5: Give her some space

Alone time – being introverted and shy, she probably likes spending time alone. Don’t take this personally, but sometimes she’ll say no to your date idea or hanging out. Give her some space but don’t lose interest; if she doesn’t like you, it will be very obvious.

Give her some space

Tip 6: Take it for what it is worth

This may be a strange concept to you, but shy girls are often incredibly good listeners. This might be something you haven’t had in a relationship before, so take it for what it is worth. She’ll add in when she wants to, but she’ll listen to every word and thought that you have. 

Tip 7: Understand her silence

She’s not mad – it’s just a natural response to assume that silence means something is wrong. Remember, being quiet is a characteristic of being shy. If you’ve dated women before who are outgoing and talkative, silence can mean you screwed up, but when dating a shy woman, silence is the status quo. 

Tip 8: She doesn’t want a shy guy

Most of her friends are probably very outgoing and they’re a good reminder for her that it’s okay to loosen up every once in a while. She doesn’t want a shy guy because as the saying goes, opposites attract. Two shy people, in theory, don’t seem to be the best equation for a successful relationship. One person needs to keep the wheels turning and keep the spark and excitement alive. 

Tip 9: She will be outgoing

The light at the end of the shyness tunnel is that she’ll be outgoing with you once she’s comfortable and knows exactly what she’s into. Keep the eyes on the prize and like her for who she is. Trust us! As you may know, each girl is a complex puzzle with a seemingly impossible solution and shy girls add another level of difficulty.

But with these tips, we hope that you find some success if you find yourself interested in a quiet one. At Baeby, we are passionate about helping singles find their counterparts, whether it’s for some casual fun or something long-term. Check us out today and start your search for fun or love by matching with singles who are looking for someone just like you!